Saturday, February 13, 2010

#16 Dating

BYU kids date like crazy.

This is perfectly fine, of course, but just a heads up…

There are 30,000 students at BYU so naturally, they are all going to have differences in dating styles. While they all believe in dating, they have varying preferences. Below, a few dating types are introduced:

Provo All-Star
• Sex: Male
• Age: 26+
• Major: Graduated
• Standard Date: Hitting on a BYU co-ed at a APX party, taking her back to his apartment (which he actually owns, but rents to other college kids so they introduce him to young college girls), cuddling up on the couch, and ‘watching’ a movie.


Aspiring EQP
• Sex: Male
• Age: 21
• Major: Chemistry, Math or Latin American Studies
• Standard Date: Making dinner at his apartment, going through mission pictures, playing Catch Phrase with other couples, home by 10:00.

BYUSA Bro
• Sex: Male
• Age: 22-24, occasionally Pre-Mission (18)
• Major: Communications, RMYL or Business
• Standard Date: Heading to Guitars Unplugged, Big Band Night, or other BYUSA activity he’s planned, catching a movie at the Varsity theatre, getting ice cream at Creamery on Ninth, and ending with a romantic walk around campus.

The Hipster Kid
• Sex: Male
• Age: 20 (don’t ask)
• Major: Journalism, Advertising or Art
• Standard Date: Dinner at Guru’s, show at Velour, shakes at Sammy’s, end with a jam session and going through vinyl records.

DIY Darling
• Sex: Female
• Major: Photography, Music or Humanities
• Hometown: New York
• Impressed by: Guys that have looked at her Etsy shop, good fashion, coffee houses, live music, the green movement, causes. Sit her down to talk about how non-eco-friendly BYU is and she’s all yours.

Perfect 10
• Sex: Female
• Major: Public Relations or Business
• Hometown: Southern California
• Impressed by: Cruiser bikes, surfing, nice cars, gym-rats, boys that live at Belmont. Tell her you are heading to California next weekend, and she’ll happily accompany you.

Lady In Waiting
• Sex: Female
• Major: MRS Degree
• Hometown: Orem, UT
• Impressed by: APs, RMs, and EQPs. Ask her to marry you. Quick.

The Smart Girl
• Sex: Female
• Major: Pre-Med or Pre-Law
• Hometown: Boston
• Impressed by: Smart guys, intellectual conversation, world travelers, International Cinema, and men that aren’t intimidated by her ambition. Tell her you were accepted to Harvard, Stanford, and Yale, but chose BYU because you felt it was the right thing to do.

That summarizes the majority of the BYU daters. Best of luck as you either venture on dates, listen to your roommates complain about dates, or witness awkward dates. The BYU experience would truly not be the same were it not for this cultural phenomenon. Hopefully you find out what type of dater you are, and which dater you prefer, and you two can find eternal happiness.

21 comments:

The Yellow Dart said...

Funny that you took a picture of the first text I ever wrote you. How did you get my phone?!?!

Erin said...

you know whats a little scary, is that I've definitely been out with all of those types of guys, and this sort of nailed it on the head. hahaha...

Autumn Lynn said...

Wow, I think you have a knack at this. That pretty much sums up Provo...

Dan said...

I love a good conversation about how dope my mission prez is. Helps a date go great!

Anonymous said...

This is right on the money. Oh, and EQP's are intimidated by former RSP's or F-RM's but they shouldn't be. That's BYU for ya.

Samip said...

Where do you fall on the list????

David Vernon said...

i think my favorites are hipster kid and lady in waiting. spot on. (age 20: don't ask). nice.

Sean said...

Yet again, I don't fit in. I think I should have gone to another school or I should quit BYU to go to another school.

Jenny Pate said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Another cool thing to blog about would be the new FAD game craze at BYU, called NINJA DESTRUCTION.

Jeff Rosenbaugh said...

Yeah, I'm with Sean, I don't fit in either... Story of my life! I guess it's just proof that midwest guys don't tend to fit in completely with the BYU culture.

Meghan Smith said...

if you know of any hipsters.. let me know. that's RIGHT up my alley

Kellee Marie Cook said...

I'll take a provo all-star. so many to choose from...

Reyna said...

Oh my gosh, happiness at the stereotypes! How I love BYU.

Beatrice and Laura said...

"The Hipster Kid" and "Provo All-Star" cracked me up. BYU dating is nuts sometimes...

C80lyn said...

Hm...I don't quite fit in anywhere on this list. Good. Nobody will be on the hunt for me then. Whew.

AjaxTheGreek said...

Actually, legend has it that this blogger has actually dated at least one of each of those types. One guy said she had a kindly and friendly manner that was often mistaken by neanderthals for a romantic interest. And she would agree to one date, out of general neighborliness, even going out with most neanderthals, but not a second date for anyone but Adonis when he shows up some day in a coach and four.

Darci said...

I do believe you have missed all the theatre majors. . . though they typically stick to themselves because its hard to match their weirdness....

Alan said...

The Smart Girl, actually accepted to Harvard, Stanford, and Yale but went to BYU because her mission president said to.

HD Radio® Farce said...

BYU students sound like a fucking bunch of over-sexed two-year olds! Grow up!

Anonymous said...

A dating site made FOR these zoobies BY these zoobies! provobro.com