Sunday, November 9, 2008

#5 Overused Words

On college campuses you can rarely have a conversation without hearing a few choice, four letter words. Just walking through the halls, minding your own business, these words make it to your ears. It is the unoriginality, not the meaning, of these terms that can cause the ears significant pain.

Just because BYU has a demographic of students that choose not to swear (some more than others) does not mean the campus is free from painful words. Whether you are a part of a conversation, or just overhearing one, you are subject to BYU’s own cliché terms.

If you truly wish to be a part of BYU culture, you need to be informed of these words. Not only so you can use them to show your original unoriginality, but so don't wince or vomit in your first encounters with them.

ran•dom (noun, verb, adjective, and everything else)

“Oh my gosh, when John came over with brownies last night, that was so random!”
“Dude, I just made out with that random chick across the street” “Whoa, dude, so random.”
“So, I randomly decided to take underwater basket weaving.”
“This homework, so random.”
“I’m such a random person, I love doing random things, hanging out with random people, going to random places. I LOVE random, I’m like, the definition of random.”

Are you gagging? The saturation of the word ‘random’ in the above examples is sufficient preparation as to the actual usage level on campus.

con•cep•tu•al•ly, con•cep•tu•al•ize (and any other form)

These words, and various other terms, are used by the nerd-ier BYU crowd. (Clarification: nerdy in this sense refers to the BYU students more inclined towards studying, homework, and the like. Nerdy can actually define the entire BYU population, but there are sub-categories.)

Common uses are:
“Professor, I loved your lecture, you are my role model, but do you think you could explain to me a little more conceptually what is going on?”
“I need to wrap my brain around this concept. I got a 105% on the exam, but conceptually, I don’t quite know the material.”
“So, I’ve done my homework three weeks ahead, I feel like I really can conceptualize this concept, conceptually. I really get it. I love these concepts.”

I think you can understand the usage now, conceptually.

awk•ward (adjective)

“OMG, it was so awkward, Zack was over at my apt watching a movie, and Brian came over with cookies. I felt so awkward. Oh it was awkward!!”
“I have to go talk with my bishop tonight. Awkward.”
“Dude, that random chick I made out with? Ya, she texted me. Man, it was awkward.”

Very often, you will find the words awkward and random in the same sentence.

play (verb)

“You should play with me and my roommates!!!”
“Last night? Oh we just went to dinner and played.”
“Call me soon!! I want to play!”

Only used by girls, but overused nonetheless. This is an important term to know about, as it could easily be interpreted as something else.

shi* (an obvious substitute for a four letter word)

The asterisk above can be replaced with any consonant, or just left off entirely. I don’t think you need any examples, as it is just used in the same situations as the actual word. It is a favorite on campus.

There are, of course, other words to this list, but this is the worst of them. If you integrate these words into your vocabulary, your transition to zoobie life will be a smooth one.

An example sentence for your first experience on campus:

“I really love BYU. There are so many random people to play with, and so many awkward things to do! But shi* the classes are hard, I don’t understand the concepts at all!”

Memorize that and you will be fine. Also, if you choose to wear ear plugs, I won’t judge you, even though you will look soooo awkward!


Chase said...

Post more! I keep coming back thinking you'll have something new up and it's still the same funny stuff, but the same stuff! Come on, post more, post more (imagine thousands of people chanting in the street).

Sarah Ann said...

Love this blog! I was very weirded out by how everyone used the word "random" when I got here as a freshman. I think it's a western U.S. thing because everyone used it like that but me (born and raised in the midwest). But of course now I use it too after 5 years at BYU!